Happy Fathers Day my fellow Alpha Dads, I know the day already passed, but the mission you have as a dad is definitely not over.
You’ve been given a gift, the gift of family.

Whether you’re a single dad or you’re married, the point is you are responsible for another life. And when you step into the role of fatherhood, you come to realize very quickly that this job is extremely hard.

Some men run away from that responsibility and their children suffer because of it. Others are so caught up in their vices, that even though they’re physically present at home, they’re so checked out it’s almost like they’re not even there. Other men get forced out of their families by evil, selfish women who want nothing more than to see those men suffer and they will use the kids as the bargaining chip to make that happen. And then there’s men who are doing everything in their God given power to do what’s right by their family. They work hard to keep their wife and kids happy and their home peaceful, but at times it still feels like a losing battle.

Why do I say that? Well, it’s because most of the world outside of your home wants you to fail. They don’t care about your family, your kids, your marriage. All they care about is one thing, you wanna know what that is?

Control.

The world out there wants to control every aspect of your family. They want your kids to turn against you and grow up confused about their beliefs and core values. They want your marriage not to work out. They want you to be weak. They need you to be weak.

This is why they sedate you with distractions and try to influence you to think like them without question. Because if they get you, then they got your whole family.

Now my question for you, father to father, man to man is this…Are You Gonna Let Them?

If the answer to that question is No, then I want you to stick around because I’m gonna share with you one of the ultimate ways that you as a dad can be the most dominant influence in your family’s life.

As family men, we all had a vision for what that family life would be like before we got married and started having kids. In my own life, I almost missed out on the family experience just because I was ruled by my vices and a weak mindset. Almost ending my marriage in divorce in only our second year. My ideal vision for my family almost died right there.

If it wasn’t for a man who took on the role of a father figure for me, someone who I call Pops. He helped me find this thing I like to call an “Alpha Dad Mindset.”
Which was something that was deeply hidden within me and needed to be uncovered.
Once he showed me how to tap into that power, it changed my life forever.

Now my wife and I have been married almost 12 years and have two beautiful, amazing children. Our marriage is stronger and more passionate than ever. We’re living in the biggest house we’ve ever lived in. Making the most money we’ve ever made. And I can with certainty say that the vision I had for my family came true.

And I’ve come to find that many men within my generation have not been able to make this happen for themselves. They haven’t been able to create the ideal family life they envisioned. Well I’m here to tell you that if a guy like me could do it, so can you. Which is exactly why I started Alpha Dad Consulting so that I can help family men just like you uncover that Alpha Dad Mindset, so that you can do the same in your life.

With Father’s day just passing here in 2022, the importance of our role within the family has never been greater.
And one of the biggest super powers you have as a Dad over your family is the power of influence. And how does that famous phrase go, “with great power comes great responsibility.”

So what does that mean? It means that you will influence your family intentionally or unintentionally and it is imperative that you are responsible with that power.

Have you ever heard the story of the 2 brothers?

There’s probably different iterations of this, but this is how I remember it when it was told to me.
There was a family, a husband and a wife with 2 twin boys.

The wife got sick and ended up passing away due to her health issues, so the dad got left alone with 2 sons to raise on his own.
The dad was so devastated about losing his wife that he turned to drinking to drown out the pain.
In the process he became addicted, drunk every night, not able to hold a job, and was easily angered by his 2 sons.
At times he couldn’t control his anger so he started beating his sons every time he was drunk.

He became a nightmare for the boys and they lived in that until they turned 18.
10 years go by and we get to see where the boys who were now men ended up.

One of them was drunk every night, consumed by alcohol, couldn’t hold a job and lived in a horrible place.
The other had become an entrepreneur, ran a successful business, had a beautiful wife and kids and lived in a great neighborhood.

When they were both asked how they each ended up like this, they had the same answer:
“My dad was a drunk and abusive my whole life…”

The influence of this father was impressed upon both boys, yet each of them had a different response.
The drunk one, used his father’s influence as an excuse to be just like him or even worse.
The successful one, used his father’s influence as a reason to not be like him and do the opposite.

It’s an interesting story because even though one of the brother’s became successful despite his hardship, it’s still sad for his brother and his dad.
I would much rather see the entire family win.

If the father would’ve chosen a different path and understood the influential power he had over his sons, he could’ve done something different. He could have been someone different. A man that showed his sons, that despited the hardship of losing their mom he was still gonna do everything in his God given power to raise those boys to right and give them his best.

Can you imagine how that story would’ve gone if he did that? I would argue that all 3 of them would be winning right now.
That’s how pivotal your role as a father is.

The influence you have over your family will make or break them. So you have to wield this power responsibly.

And I’m going to give you the key to being a dominant influence in your family’s life. I hope you’re ready for this because it’s an extremely simple concept to grasp, but if you’re not paying attention you may miss it. So here it is…

Go First.

I’m gonna say it again, you ready?
Go First.

What do I mean by that?

I mean that whatever you want your wife and your kids to do that will contribute to transforming your life at home into that vision you’ve always had in your mind. You Go First.

I used to hate it when my parents would tell me to read a book or do good in school, when they themselves would never pick up a book or set foot in a classroom. I love them to death, but the more they beat it into me, the more resistant I was because the influence that they placed over me was that of not educating themselves. My dad did not Go First, he wanted me to do it.

If your wife, doesn’t dress up anymore or try to watch her figure like she used to when you were dating and that bothers you. But you’re over there looking like DJ Khaled looking for “another one” of these doughnuts, you need to Go First.

If your kids spend all their time being distracted by screens all day and that bothers you. But you’re over here watching freakin Tik Tok videos sharing them with all your friends at work, you gotta Go First.

Whatever change in behavior you wanna see in them, you need to Lead them by Going First.

You remember the movie 300, King Leonidas. Was he in the back during those epic battles? No, he was at the front leading his men, showing them that he is worthy of being their leader. All the while, you got King Xerxes on the other side hiding behind his army, thinking that he’s a god, but in reality he was a coward.

Be like King Leonidas, and always Go First.
When you do that, your family will follow. Keep in mind that it may not be right away, especially if this is something you’ve never done before.

They need to witness you consistently going first every time. If you’re patient and follow through every day, your influence will grow and will make a tremendous impact on them.

Until next time my fellow Alpha Dad,
- G. Vidal